We get asked a lot about how to tell if you or a loved one is addicted to pornography. We even came up with a Self-Test so individuals can assess the severity of their behaviors. We decided to also make up an infographic that is a little more shareable. Let us know what you think, share it with your friends, and we hope it helps.
Candeo Co-Founder, Dr. Bernell Christensen
As a therapist, I’m often asked, “Is sex a need or an appetite?” This is a great question and one that I’m going to answer with a simple response—”Yes”—it’s both.
As you will learn in the Candeo program, every human being is born with the capacity for sexual desire. It’s a basic instinct to sustain our own species through procreation. And just as important, we also have the innate need to experience deep connection and intimacy with another human being. Sexual thoughts and desires are very normal and natural. It’s only when these thoughts and desires become exaggerated, that they turn destructive.
We get a lot of questions about what we do at Candeo and how we go about helping people overcome difficult sexual addictions. The following info-graph is our attempt to consolidate the brain science behind sexual addiction and how addictions to pornography, masturbation, and other sexual behaviors affect the brain.
Another study has been published that draws primarily on Candeo students. It investigates the relationship of shame and guilt to hypersexual behavior.
For more details, you can view an abstract of the article here: http://www.informaworld.com/smpp/content~content=a934602668~db=all~jumptype=rss
We are excited about the growing interest of researchers in Candeo and the promising findings that are reported. The program is 100% anonymous and available 24/7.
By: Mark Chamberlain, Ph.D.
The amazing thing about pornography is how it can keep arousal fresh when it would otherwise stagnate; excitement electric when it would neutralize; keep us awake when we’d otherwise sleep. And awake, and awake, and awake . . .
Marnia Robinson and Gary Wilson probe porn’s secret recipe for keeping the high going. Key ingredient: the convincing illusion of so many willing participants eager to have sex with little old “moi” the viewer. (This is where the the brain’s illogical, gullible, pleasure-driven Responder screams, “This is real!”)
Having grown-up in a highly dysfunctional family, and being the one introverted boy, in a houseful of 3 dominating sisters. An abused mother by an alcoholic father, I quickly learned at a very young age not to trust others to fulfill my needs. I escaped into a world of “fantasy”, as a way of coping with the neglect and abuse that we all constantly lived with.
From comic books depicting heroines’ in tight bustier costumes, to finding my father’s “stash”, and eventually “acting out” by way of spying on my sister’s and their friends. I escalated into the world of hard-core porn and voyeurism. I was 12 or 13 yrs old. Over the next 30 yrs, I became a “full blown” addict. I had little to no experience with women, preferring to spend my time with porn magazines, and xxx movies. I never developed any social skills, I never dated, I never had sex until I was 35 year’s old. My life revolved around my addictions. I even managed to get myself a criminal record before I was 21. I finished high school, but didn’t have steady income until I was in my 30’s.
Is “real” lasting change actually possible? What are the signs and the evidence that you’re truly changing your unwanted sexual behaviors?
Listen to The Podcast
Dr. Bernell Christensen
An important part of breaking free from unwanted sexual outlets and behaviors, is learning how to harness and direct your sexual urges and desires in healthy ways. We all have a “sex drive.” It’s completely natural and normal to have sexual thoughts, urges and desires. In fact, this is nothing more or less than “the power to co-create life” being manifest in us. This includes the power to co-create a human life, and to co-create the life of a relationship. Having sexual urges and desires in no way makes you a bad, perverted or flawed person! It’s what you do with these urges–how you direct this power and this energy, that makes all the difference.
When I was young we joked about ‘jerking off’ or ‘jacking off,’ of course I knew this was really called masturbating. But calling it “masturbating” sounded like something my health teacher would have said, and certainly didn’t sound much like fun. I grew up thinking of it as something recreational that all guys do. I believed it was perfectly natural, and normal.